Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Sum up Charlotte in six words

The story goes that Ernest Hemingway once claimed his finest work consisted of six words: "For sale: baby shoes, never worn."

The people at Smith magazine took that idea and ran with it, asking readers to send in six-word memoirs. They're now collected in a book, "Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs From Writers Famous and Obscure."

Some samples from the book:

Cursed with cancer, blessed with friends.



I still make coffee for two.



I like big butts, can't lie.


(Threw that last one in there to let you know they're not all bittersweet.)

So here's your challenge: How would you sum up Charlotte in six words?

Here's a few to get you started:

We tore that down years ago.

Don't go to church? Really? Hmmm....

Where Buffalo comes to get warm.

OK, this is harder than it looks. You can do better. Six words, no more, no less. Show us what you've got.

230 comments:

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Anonymous said...

Used to be nice, not anymore.

Anonymous said...

Spent money uptown, ignored the rest.

Anonymous said...

No gang problem, crime is down.

Anonymous said...

Birthplace of the Hidden Valley Kings.

Anonymous said...

Carjacking is a way of life.

Anonymous said...

What Bobcats? We miss the Hornets!

Fast food, chain restaurants are everywhere!

Good weather, nice people, great times.

Anonymous said...

Grew up here, will die here.

Anonymous said...

Home of your favorite band, Antiseen.

eye_dee_ten_tea said...

At least we're not Detroit - yet.

Anonymous said...

Big bank buildings, but jobs outsourced.

Anonymous said...

We don't incarcerate criminals very long.

Anonymous said...

Sanctuary city for illegal alien invaders.

Anonymous said...

An affordable, vanilla, pretentious Southern 'town'

Anonymous said...

Charlotte's a beautiful place to live

Anonymous said...

Left Cleveland cold for Ballantyne warmth.

Couldn't survive without Tomlinson's insightful columns.

Panthers are ours win or lose.

Avoid 485 during all rush hours!

Providence to Waxhaw? I think not!

Anonymous said...

Native Charlotteans? I'm the only one.

One more transplant and I'll die.

Anonymous said...

Worst newspaper in the United States

Anonymous said...

Gastonia really ain't so bad anymore


MrAfternoon

Anonymous said...

northern invaders now own this place

Anonymous said...

Sunny Skies, nice people, beautiful city

Anonymous said...

What a beautiful blue sky today!

Anonymous said...

Smart, ambitious, still needs more work.

Grand in-town neighborhoods are the best.

Newcomers and natives are both needed.

NASCAR, global finance, nowhere but here.

Trees are our treasure, take care.

Trains, planes, automobiles are all here.

Anonymous said...

currently boring, but has some potential

Anonymous said...

Big City with a Town Mentality

Anonymous said...

Big city, with small town mentality

Too many Republicans spoil this town

Charlotte's the way, unless you're gay

Queen City, small town, small minds

There's a new sheriff in town

Anonymous said...

Who said light rail would fail?

Anonymous said...

Misery loves company, Charlotte ranks 9th!

Fake boob capital of the south.

Where shirt collars are still flipped.

Anonymous said...

Yankee transplants ran out native Charlotteans.

My hometown, moved out of county.

I want my old city back.

Anonymous said...

Thank God Nick Mackey isn't Sherriff.

To much crime and trashy neighborhoods.

To much hate not enough love.

Panthers the best no matter what!!

Anonymous said...

Valentine returned marked 'return to sender'

My heart thirsts for her smile.

For Sale Man's suits shirts shoes.

Found: scrap book in dumpster.

I never saw her again.

Never a word from the kids.

Anonymous said...

Natives whine about mean, pushy newcomers.

Newcomers gripe about slow-moving natives.

It's nice here. Quiet, all gripewhiners.

Anonymous said...

Too many drivers, too few highways

Anonymous said...

Working class folks need not apply.

Anonymous said...

Bankers and lawyers rule here now!

Anonymous said...

Look up superficial in the dictionary.

Anonymous said...

Iredell County looks better every day.

Anonymous said...

In need of its own identity.

Anonymous said...

Plenty of churches, but no soul.

Anonymous said...

High taxes, wasteful government, oldschool politics

Anonymous said...

Which church/bank do you belong?

Anonymous said...

Let's loosen our Bible belt again.

Anonymous said...

some progress, long ways to go

mwilsonc said...

ungrateful newcomers complain but never leave

Anonymous said...

To the first poster:

Used to suck, much better now.

Used to be ugly, not anymore.

Anonymous said...

BOA, CMC, CMS, NASCAR, UNCC,77/85/485

Anonymous said...

Came here because our economy sucked

Anonymous said...

Complain, can't get job back home.

Anonymous said...

The backwards rednecks are really annoying.

Charlotte's better now more than ever.

Charlotte's only going to get better.

The Civil War has been over.

People will keep on moving here.

You can't do anything about it.

Anonymous said...

Republicans try to ruin Charlotte's potential.

The small town mentality must die.

Anonymous said...

Yes we have an identity crisis.

Anonymous said...

We're becoming where people move from

Anonymous said...

A city that hates different people.

A city that hates gay people.

A city influenced by jesus freaks.

A city that needs some work.

Anonymous said...

Boat shoes are not in style.

Robin Burns said...

Gorgeous foliage spawns necessary evil - POLLEN!

Anonymous said...

A place that has no pride.

A place no one takes seriously.

A place where people continuously bitch.

Anonymous said...

Built between two nuclear power plants.

Anonymous said...

my home. I love it here.

Anonymous said...

Non-attainment of ozone air quality standards.

Anonymous said...

Moved out of county, laughing now.

Anonymous said...

To all the haters out there:

Charlotte is an awesome city now.

You will never have it back.

HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Anonymous said...

Can I have my traffic supersized?

Anonymous said...

Wish for more optimisim in everyone

Anonymous said...

Traffic, unclean air, school problems.

Anonymous said...

always evolving above ancient azalea blooms

Anonymous said...

Guns in school, all week long.

Anonymous said...

willow oaks, blue skies, wonderful people

Anonymous said...

Love my kids, so I'm leaving.

Anonymous said...

Haters pack up and move, now!

Anonymous said...

Destroy trees, name communities after them.

Anonymous said...

Build arenas who cares about schools.

Anonymous said...

Thank God for southern hospitality Ya'll!

Anonymous said...

Conformist norm bots love drinking lattes.

Anonymous said...

McJobs, McFashions, McBars, McMusic, McMalls, McPeople

Michael said...

I like Charlotte, sorry you don't.

Whiners, put barrel in mouth now.

Anonymous said...

I love to eat fried pickles.

Anonymous said...

Pick up trucks are not "cool".

Stop driving them like sports cars.

Anonymous said...

Venture out of your own neighborhood.

Then you won't think Charlotte's boring.

Anonymous said...

feel free to take I-95 north.

Halfway between Mexico and New Jersey.

Anonymous said...

Buenos dias, buenos tardes, buenos noches

Anonymous said...

Better than most cities its size.

Anonymous said...

More people does not equal progress.

Anonymous said...

Michael forgot to take his Xanax.

Anonymous said...

Home is where the doublewide is.

Anonymous said...

Full of selfish, profiteering people.

Anonymous said...

Too many yankees are moving here,

Anonymous said...

The place I hate to live

Anonymous said...

Run away from this place quickly!

Anonymous said...

Full of itself; not that great

Anonymous said...

vanilla vanilla vanilla vanilla vanilla vanilla

Anonymous said...

Build it and they will come

Anonymous said...

Friendly, but don't mess with Banks.

Anonymous said...

trainsn' cranes, banksn', yanks, driedn', fried

The Pretender said...

Far from a world class city

Anonymous said...

I'm rich, you're not, stop whining.

Anonymous said...

yankees need to keep moving here

Anonymous said...

Get carjacked outside your new McMansion!!

Anonymous said...

More people definately does equal progress.

Charlotte definately needs a lot more people.

This ain't a small town anymore.

Anonymous said...

Make this place just like Buffalo!!!

Anonymous said...

Molly Grantham and Morgan Fogarty rock!!!

Anonymous said...

Love to watch my city grow.
Come to visit, stay for life.

Anonymous said...

All the rednecks need to leave.

Anonymous said...

Yankees aren't just moving to Charlotte.

Lots of other people are too.

Get over it and shut up.

Anonymous said...

Charlotte is much better than Buffalo.

Anonymous said...

A lot of trailer parks everywhere.

Anonymous said...

No water, no worries, build more.

No water, drink gin and tonics.

Only the winners are supported here.

Anonymous said...

School Board that can't get along

City Council that can't get along

Tree lined streets killed by cankers

Tommy Tomlinson is our prize possession

Anonymous said...

The place everyone loves to hate.

Anonymous said...

Check Queen City Area dot net!

Twenty Years here and lovin' it.

Country Roads, Big stores, Traffic Sucks!

Anonymous said...

Charlotte bloggers like to ##### ALOT

Anonymous said...

Liberals caught in a conservative town

Anonymous said...

City with vision that needs glasses

Anonymous said...

Arrogant mayor, wannabe city, congested, moved

Anonymous said...

no leadership, no planning, no vision

Anonymous said...

Worst place I have ever lived

please please please please relocate me

Anonymous said...

build some fricken retail uptown ASAP

too bad it doesnt snow here

Banks! I bury money in backyard

sweet mother of god trade peppers

rick flair for mayor in 201_

Anonymous said...

Big City with nothing to do

Anonymous said...

Bad drivers worse roads nice weather

Anonymous said...

backwater city in a backwater state

dolla dolla bill yall said...

Cash rules everything around mecklenburg county

Anonymous said...

Home is where the heart is.

Anonymous said...

charlotte's boring because you are boring.

Anonymous said...

An ever changing, progressive southern city.

Anonymous said...

What? You were born here?

Anonymous said...

Worst of north moving here

No jobs in Ohio, Upstate NY

Cool, but you don't own things

Learn to appreciate a vibrant city

Here long before you were born

Anonymous said...

Great for families, not single people.

Chris said...

My money is going towards THAT?!?!?!

Anonymous said...

Public Library of Charlotte & Mecklenburg County

Anonymous said...

Beats the hell out of Florida!

Anonymous said...

Library, Observer - great! Housing too expensive...

Anonymous said...

People vote "No"? Build it anyways

Anonymous said...

Wilkinson Blvd is our 8 Mile

Anonymous said...

Focusing on inside 277, nowhere else

Anonymous said...

Makes sense to build everything Uptown.

Quit your bitching, uptown is important.

Center City represents who we are.

Uptown should be healthy and vibrant.

hamstang said...

The Best Damn Place To Live

Anonymous said...

planes leave hourly you arrogant ingrates

Anonymous said...

George Washington is a trifling surprised.

Anonymous said...

Whiners will still whine next stop.

Never happy, never give, constant moan.

Rust Belt sucks, we came here.

In NY/SF you'd whine and fail.

Griping follows you no matter where.

Relocate your !@#$% self (you can't.)

Anonymous said...

Most like Charlotte. Redneck losers scram.

Charlotte center city we love you.

Faux people passing through hurry up.

Be part of Charlotte or leave.

Anonymous said...

SO WHAT CHURCH DO YOU ATTEND?
YOU ARE NOT FROM AROUND HERE.
POLITICS AND RACE ISSUES TARNISH CHARLOTTE,
SCHOOLS NOT GOOD PAY TEACHERS MORE.
GROWTH WITHOUT INFOSTRUCTURE EQUALS CHARLOTTE'S DOWNFALL.
ICE OR RAIN SOUTHERNERS SHOULD'NT DRIVE.
TWO LANE HIGHWAYS NICE ENGINEERING CONCEPT.

Anonymous said...

Whiners look directly into the mirror.

You yourself are not so fabulous.

Coulda been in SF? Oh please.

Schools suck? How have you helped?

Miner said...

Anything Atlanta spends, we'll spend double.

John said...

City of potential, divided too far
Many with vision, Many so blind
Money rules life, Many see hate
Some with soul, Many don't care
City so clean, but dirty beneath

Flying Squirrel said...

I'm a local, want a picture?

Anonymous said...

Where do you go to church?

Anonymous said...

Neo Big City, Politically Small Mind

Anonymous said...

Watched her grow, just love her.
Crockett Park, Cal Ripken played here.
Hornets rocked us like a hurricane.
Jake led Panthers to Super Bowl XXXVIII
Fans on fire shook the rafters.
Sometimes miss the way we were.

Anonymous said...

"Sum Up Charlotte in Six Words"

A CITY BUILT BY ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS!

And that's the truth, people!!

Jesper S. said...

Armed princes, fake princess - Queen City !!

Anonymous said...

We love cars, screw the air

Anonymous said...

Charlotte, controlled by Chamber of Commerce

Charlotte, a friendly place before Yankees.

Want different weather, wait three days.

Tax the natives, subsidize the Chamber.

Charlotte Native for 55 years

Anonymous said...

Fled NY taxes, now raising ours!

Anonymous said...

Ya'll let Colored folks eat here?

Anonymous said...

People, please learn how to drive.

Multiple vehicle wreck on Independence Blvd.

One hundred job applications, two interviews.

Anonymous said...

Big city wannabe, white professionals only.

Anonymous said...

Yippee! I live in Lincoln county!

Anonymous said...

Historic? Green space? Tear it down.

Anonymous said...

Illegals moved in. I moved out.

Anonymous said...

Bad Traffic. High taxes. Indifferent councilmen.

Anonymous said...

Born elsewhere; will grow old here.

Anonymous said...

So much for the middle-class!

Anonymous said...

no class, no style, misery, yes

Anonymous said...

subdivisions,strip malls,parking lots

Anonymous said...

Charlotte, it's not perfect, just great.

Anonymous said...

Charlotte? What state is it in?

Anonymous said...

Pathetic, naive, Yankee ridden city, yuck!

Anonymous said...

Federal Bureau of Rock and Roll (FBRNR).

Great weather,people,music,and golf :)

Friday nights listening to Lenny Federal

Anonymous said...

Slogan: Not quite all grown up.

Anonymous said...

City fueled by sell out realtors.

Anonymous said...

Hot, cliquey, traffic, bank-heavy, ruined

Anonymous said...

drive thru between mountains and coast

Anonymous said...

arrogant yuppies, redneck hicks, illegal gangs

Anonymous said...

Pepole proud of their plastic city.

Anonymous said...

Don't you mean Charleton South Carolina?

Anonymous said...

Live? Work? Live? Married? Live? Oh!


Don't like it here, try Atlanta!

Get outside, don't watch the game

Get the paper for the coupons

Linnea said...

Most pretentious city in universe.

Anonymous said...

Unless you like Nascar, there's nothing

Anonymous said...

lousy: jobs,schools,housing,roads,sports

lousy: air,soil,water,parks,trails,lakes

lousy: shopping,restaurants,arts,newspaper
radio stations

Anonymous said...

roll up the sidewalks at dusk

Anonymous said...

Radios always use the word "queer"

Anonymous said...

yankee money eagerly accepted by locals.

slientwhispers said...

wants more stadiums, where? no space

Anonymous said...

naive yankee marrying southerner equals hell.

southern hospitality another old southern myth.

Gone with the Wind southern delusions.

passports required by incoming furrin yankees

Gastonian fears Charlotte invasion builds wall.

Anonymous said...

It's no Kannapolis, but it'll do.

Anonymous said...

It's no Kannapolis, but it'll do.

Anonymous said...

Wow, Charlotte does sound pretty bad!

At least the skyline looks nice.

Marsha said...

GET OFF THE PHONE AND DRIVE!!!

Anonymous said...

to seem, rather than to be

Anonymous said...

OUT WITH MANUFACTORING IN WITH BANKING.
NOT INCLINED FOR GROWTH POOR CHARLOTTE.
SO WHAT SIDE OF CHARLOTTE YOU IN?
OBSERVER STOP PUBLISHING UNC NEWS CONSTANTLY.
WAFFLE HOUSES SOUTHERNERS OBSESSION FOR BREAKFAST.

Anonymous said...

Charlotte, fat and fatter people unite!

Anonymous said...

Charlotte - the county that the state hates.

Anonymous said...

Grandmother's home now
a parking deck.

Anonymous said...

Nice uptown, surronded by all slums.

What are those silos off 277?

City trying to grow, no planning?

Build everything with no new infrastructure?

Nice weather, but it ends there.

Love it or Leave it, YES!!!!!

Push 1 to continue in ENGLISH!!!!

Tax base gets bigger, our expense.

Make friends with Raleigh, need money....

Big city, with DARK interstate roads?????

Enough bashing for one early morning

Anonymous said...

Was nice, before Yankees and illegals

Anonymous said...

Don't attempt The Philly Cheesesteak please!

Anonymous said...

Growth does not pay for itself!

Misery index soars, uptown does too.

Anonymous said...

How did I fall for this!

Anonymous said...

Leave subdivision, welcome to old country.

Anonymous said...

Friends shouldn't let friends buy vinyl.

Anonymous said...

To Charlotte Mecklenburg: Enforce Litter Laws

Anonymous said...

NC Motto: Esse quam videri. Charlotte ?

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